On 29/VI/88, we started to check and handle the opened cycles we had handled before, but left opened because of interferences, just like when in Excalibur you are handling something until you get into the holder and you can't go any further, and then you handle the holder and then continue with what you were handling.
So, on checking if the Black Glass Ball was still there, the answer was that it was not there any more, but the idea of it was already there. Unpleasant feeling of it as if it were there, when it shouldn't he there any more. Tracing this feeling back, got to a guy in the OT's body, with the Postulate, being the Postulate: "HE IS MY BODY!!"
We started PrPr 1 on it:
He was thereto influence the body from the OT, but he didn't get any more orders, as the guy who was telling what to do, is not there any more.
He agreed to be used for not his purpose. He must have been unconscious.
He seemed to be the body, but he wasn't, and he could do the opposite than the OT of the body wanted, and giving somatics and stopping handlings.
He was wrong in doing that, but he had to go on, or held lose his honour. Wanting to be right and doesn't want to be wrong.
Being the Anti-MEST body and not the body!
Taken to EP.
V/I R/W with immediate F/N.
PrPr 3: A 1.1 guy promised him a nice game and he got hatted, and agreed to be an Anti-MEST guy to influence the MEST body. Ep, when realizing that now that game was over.
B/CB Steps to EP.
Origination from the OT: During the PrPr6, there was one point near the end, when, from the top of the "tree" went downwards, breaking all the interconnections, and that's why this guy was not really held. Because all cognited out the basic PTS/SP mechanism!!
- Break -
After the Break, the Player (E) was contacted and the Postulate was gotten: "YOU CAN NEVER BE WHAT YOU WANT TO, BECAUSE I'LL ALWAYS STOP YOU FROM BEING THAT!!''
PrPr 1 on that.-
There was the problem of wanting to be right, and this Player thought he had to fight to be right, the rights of the others, as if the others were right, held be wrong, because he forgot that everybody can be right in this universe.
He agreed to play this PTS/SP Game and forgot it, though there were very fixed and wrong rules, but he couldn't look at it when him being wrong, as then, the whole world would collapse!
Having to live in the society with rules, and afraid of getting beaten if he doesn't follow the rules. He's afraid and tries to get the people to conform into the society rules. But this doesn't fit with mental freedom and Scientology, and he has a problem, as he fixes onto society rules, and this is shaking his stable data. This is a problem for him!! He fears that if he understood, held have to change his whole life. He never really lived! He was just fighting for survival!! He lot himself go down spiral and believing in wrong causes for effects, although he knows the actual ones. Having to control the others, or he'll be controlled and overwhelmed!
He works for Xenu, as he gave him the Tech of how to control Thetans, and Xenu promised survival to him in exchange! Freedom is really dangerous, and he made agreements with Xenu to survive, and he should have Tech to control the others, because if the Game were too free, she probably wouldn't survive. It seemed to be very stable and certain for him: To agree on Conformity and Markabian Ideals. This was something fixed. On the other side there was nothing fixed, and she had the feeling she'd not survive!
He was told that the OT (the one of the Review) was his biggest enemy, and that held have to control him, so not to be hurt by him, and he believed that. Analytically, he can see that a Thetan can't do anything but surviving, but has the idea he'll die if he doesn't fight the OT. The problem was to survive!!
He made bad postulates regarding other people. But the postulates were not only valid for the others, but also for him.
It was not his idea to make this postulate, but from Xenu. He told him held not survive otherwise.
He must have agreed that he can't survive, and so, he tries to suppress the survival of the others too, and so, the down-spiral began for her! Remembering the built-in mechanism of PTS/SP.
The problem of the others against him regarding Survival. He is fighting everybody and it is a lie, as there is not Survival and there is no death.
Trying by all means not to be discovered by anybody, as passing his M-Us to others and not really applying Scientology. To EP.
V/I R/W to a very faste EP.
PrPr 3.: He was a Thetan who wanted to play, and was uncertain because of M-Us, and tried to make experiences of how to play in the right way. Somebody told him held only survive with Stable Data, and the Stable Datum was: "DO EVERYTHING YOU CAN TO SURVIVE!!". And he thought this was OK, and since that moment, he fought and fought for survival. Xenu told him held survive the best if he controlled the others, because then, he could predict what they'd do, and then, nothing random could happen endangering his survival. This seemed to be very logical to him and he tried to control Thetans, by lying them, as then, they'd have wrong data which he knows, and he could control them via those wrong data. He got in the condition of being totally invalidated. because he went away from his knowingness and believed the lie that he has to survive, so he was in the condition of living on the basis of a lie. And that is the reason why he tries not to find out so much, because then, he could find out that his life is based an a lie, and so, his basis of being, would be none! He can see the contradiction of it and is laughing about it, as if he finds a lie about his life, that would be the truth and that would be good!! To EP at that point.
B/CB Steps, where a Co-Postulate with Xenu lot handled as a Mule.
- Break -
After the break, we continued with the guy of the Postulate: "YOU CAN'T BE BECAUSE YOU ARE TOO SILLY".
PrPr 1 on it:
He mixed up 2 Postulates to turn them around against the Players who made the Postulates, so they are not too strong.
Withholding his identity and OT got it was the Player (K). After a while there was sadness coming into the session and it was indicated Tone 40 to Player (K) that it was a wrong item for him, and continued the PrPr 1 on the guy who "pretended to be (K)".
He turned the basic Postulate of the OT, "I AM", into "YOU CAN'T BE ..." And also turned around "I'M MOKSHA...", and this got very complicated. There's a second Player, and the basic Postulate is: "IT'S ME", into "YOU WANT TO, BUT YOU CAN'T REACH IT".
And with the Postulate "YOU CAN'T BE BECAUSE YOU ARE TOO SILLY", he also turned around these two ones. So, he turned around both originals, plus the two lies upon the originals, with his postulate. That's what he did! With that, he stopped us from playing, because we are too silly to be! To EP, after getting the idea the Creator was the Player (E).
V/I R/W to EP.
PrPr 3 - Very fast also, like the V/I R/W, to EP. Steps to EP.
Contact the guy of the Postulate "I AM MOKSHA".
On the PrPr 1:
The OT actually made the postulate "I'M MOKSHA", and this guy made: "I ... AM MOKSHA". He caused the wrong item in earlier session. He just denied that the OT is MOKSHA, But him is MOKSHA, so this implies that the OT can never be MOKSHA, even if he tries to reach it, as there is another one being MOKSHA!!
He wanted to be identified with the OT. Pretending to be the OT, and wanting to be believed as being MOKSHA, and that nobody believed the OT as such.
The error is with "I... AM MOKSHA", as this is a contradiction in itself, in the meaning he made the postulate:
I....... = AM MOKSHA, while MOKSHA (A) = (A)
is basically PAN-KNOWINGNESS. In taking a beingness, Pan-Knowingness is not kept any more, because this is a contradiction, because then, you hove to not know something. Rut MOKSHA, in the meaning of Pan-Knowingness ... that doesn't fit with the beingness.
MOKSHA is another word for Native State or Static.
He mixed it up with an identity! Through that, it became an inval for her postulate! She was using MOKSHA not as an identity, but in the meaning of PAN-KNOWINGNESS, and he used it as an identity, and making himself equal to that identity!
He made that to be close to the OT without being noticed, as being an Anti-Thetan, a duplicate of her, stealing the OT's identity to control the OT, working at the other side, and being the Player (N).
With this postulate, he stopped himself from knowingness. He got difficulties in Pure Knowingness, real understanding!! He had that missing ability before that, and thought that postulating himself as MOKSHA, he would resolve the problem. But that was not the right action. because the name is not the subject! He did an overt against himself, as then, he even separated himself from himself and his basic abilities, even more than before! Something happened that separated him from being Static. And tried to find it, but couldn't get it! He was told to fight the OT, or he'd lose his identity. The Player (E) told him to do so, and he did that, but he wasn't very happy with that.
He took the role of the OT to make implanting and suppression of Thetans in the name of the OT. He is taking the Theta and uses it for implants. Thetans have to be controlled! He is not and never will.
The OT gets the feeling of being the had guy himself, as this guy is being MOKSHA, and as soon as the OT tries to expand his beingness, he hits this guy. and the OT gets the feeling that his beingness is bad, or that he is bad.
This guy needs Theta to survive and to do his job, because he has many things buttered all over the universe (CONTROL MECHANISMS), that have to be fed with Theta so they can go on working!
One of the missions of the OT is to handle this guy. Not only from the OT, but also from the Player (A).
He has been fooling Thetans in the name of getting them to Freedom. He is one of the Top Execs of the Black Org-Board, and his purpose is to handle the OT. The OT is at the same position than this guy at the Org Board, but at the other side. He took that position on the Org-Board, because she had that, but the fight between them started long before that. This is like another Series of Games before these Series of Games. He didn't end his games cycles before these ones! He didn't return to Static. He was fighting against Theta, Improvement of Theta and Games at all of Thetans. In that fighting game, the OT won and this guy lost, so he was wrong and the OT, right. After that, he should have started, according to the rules, in a new unit of time, but he broke that rule. He took that old cycle into the new game. That's the opened cycle. So, the basis from which he is operating are from an earlier game, and even is breaking the role role he is supposed to play in this game.
He has a total constant problem because from his old game, he is still suppressing, and on the other hand, is doing Scientology to finally go free and win!!
And he is sitting in the middle of it and doesn't have real case gain because of that PTP, because he didn't hit yet what he should handle!
He is missing a part of Knowingness which is vital...
- Break for the day -
Next day, 30/VI/88, we continued with this PrPr1 on the Player (N) responding the Postulate: "I ... AM MOKSHA".
He has no Theta because he gave it away. He needs to get Theta from the others, so he must be very covered so the people give Theta and don't notice that it is not OK to give Theta on these basis, because there is no exchange. There is no Theta coming back. If the people who give Theta, noticed that it is not OK to do this and stopped to give Theta on these basis, then, the others taking Theta, make them guilty or wrong, so they give Theta again. This is again, like having cows in a stable. THETA COWS!!!
Trying to control the OT even via the body. He is around the body of the OT, and gets what is going on via the body. But only the body, not what the OT is thinking. He is controlling the OT via Anti-MEST. He uses the Anti-MEST space, and via it, he gets what the OT is doing, and gets when there is a Theta output from the OT. Then, if there is a Theta output not regarding him, he can do things to stop that, because he gets that and will react on it, key-ing people or asking funny questions. So he tries to stop the OT of going into actual exchange of Theta situations with others. He needs the Theta from the OT. He made postulates to separate the OT from the main people with whom he was exchanging Theta, but now is getting all handled!!
He can't have Theta! If this were known, nobody would give it to him, as he is using the Theta he gets from the people, to control the people. So, with Theta, he feeds the control mechanisms to make people under control, so they keep giving Theta to him for the Control Mechanism, not for him, as he can't have Theta! He can't just take Theta. It has to be given to him "voluntarily".
Even if he is in the Anti-Space of the OT's space, he couldn't take the OT's Theta. The OT would have to give it to him!
So, this handles two purposes: this guy gets Theta, and the OT gets handled not to have so much.
He has to keep the OT not being too big and big enough to provide Theta to him.
He knows that if he looked at all these things, held not need Theta from other people, and could live with his own Theta. But then, he would have to take responsibility for himself, and he can't ....
He smashed the people who wanted to help him, as he can't have that, and then they could pet too close to him and discover what he is withholding, and there is no help anyway....
He has an M-U .... like ... I am nothing... Out this doesn't work because he can't be nothing. This is a total contradiction!! With that postulate he tried to come out of the game, as if he were nothing, he couldn't play a game. But now, he was nothing, but still inside the game, so he had to play out of nothing, and he had to take something from others to beg to have something to play the game, because he couldn't get out, so he tried to do it in the best way inside the Game. He had to take the Theta from others, so he was always NOTHING, but DEFINED HIMSELF ON OTHERS! That's the reason why he made the Postulate: "I ... AM MOKSHA". To have something where he was defined with. How he made the postulate "I ... AM MOKSHA": He took a part of Anti-MEST, and he postulated himself as Anti-MEST, so he became an Anti-Thetan, occupying the ANTI-SPACE of the OT's space, being the Postulate "I ... AM MOKSHA", and at the same time, being nothing! TO BE OR NOT TO BE!!!
So, defining himself as something else, he doesn't have the responsibility, but it is the PT, the one doing it, as he is the OT.
At the moment, he is an Anti-Thetan being in the gamey but playing against it. Playing against Theta!! It is like a Black Hole! A Sun is the opposite of a Black Hole! When a Sun dies, it becomes a Black Hole. This is an example for Anti-MEST. Anti-Theta and Anti-Thetans, are attracting Theta and Thetans, like Black Holes, and what they get, they turn it around into Anti-Theta, to get more Theta!! You can turn everything upside down in Anti-MEST. Exactly the opposite. These Black Holes are kind of entrance to Anti-MEST. These Black Holes are the Anti-MEST Thetans!! And as he is an Anti-Thetan using a MEST body, he can get the Theta via the MEST body.
- Break -
After the Break this PrPr 1 was continued.
There was the lie that he has no Theta and that he has to get it from the others, but, how did he come to this?
He was told that he had failed in doing something because he had no Theta. But it ups just a scenario to make him believe that, where his own Theta was turned against him.
He was brought to make a postulate working against him, like: All Theta I have is not really mine!
He was told that he misused Theta, so, he shouldn't have it. He could have Theta from others, but hold have to control himself not to become too strong, not to commit overts.
He is dependant from other Thetans! He is controlling other Thetans, but they are controlling him. It's a Games Condition!!
He thinks he has to be controlled and also control himself, or otherwise, held do terrible things! So, he can't use his own Theta, but has to use the Theta of others, to keep the control mechanism there, and this mechanism includes that HE CAN'T HAVE THETA!!! And the Theta he gets from the others, he uses it to feed this control mechanism that also keeps up that he is in the position of not being able to have Theta. It is a round complete circle! The postulate: "HE IS NOTHING BUT THE OTHERS".
It is very complicated not to kill Thetans, but to hold them at a level he can get Theta from them, like a Theta vampir. That's probably the reason why he can't have case gain. because he has to hold himself at a certain level of the tone scale. if he came up ... held die!
Pressing himself and the others down, below a certain love!, and not allowing them to go very high, and if they do, he tries to get them down again, by questioning in a funny way their wins!! So, the others get in doubt about their experiences and go down, to a certain level again.
Doubts about being immortal. He tries to prove and find out about that, and in doing so, he influences negatively the other Thetans. as a Thetan can't die, but can go insane. He pressed himself so much down, in trying to kill himself, that he is insane!! A problem for himself!!
"You are a problem because you can't live and you can't die!!''
He has no responsibility for himself, because he did so many bad things, that he can't take the responsibility for that. Held be totally wrong!!
It is much easier to be insane, as then, he can do everts without being responsible for them. He uses the Help Button. He is in bad shape, and if the others don't help him, they are responsible, as then, if they don't help him, he goes more insane, and they are responsible for what he is doing.
He invalidated the state of being MOKSHA, and in doing so, he invalidated his own state of being Static. So, Static state was silly, so he had to be something else, or he'd have been silly too!
It is a lie that there is a problem. He tried to solve a problem which was not existing. Static is not a problem!!!
He postulated himself as Static being a Problem! That's the lie! That's the 2 directions inside of a problem, and it is not true!
He tried to solve the very basic problem behind all problems, which now. he has found out was not even there, but he agreed it was there!
He said that Static is a problem and this is a contradiction and a lie. Sure, then, he was a problem as a Static!
He considered Static as a problem, not easy, and gave this idea to others as well.
He doesn't know anything less a problem than Static and he is Static too. But then, everything became a problem for him, since he considered Static was a problem, as Static is everything! That's the basic M-U!!
He tried to solve Static as a problem, but Static is not a problem. But the conditions in what Static can be, they are a problem, because anything being something different than Pure Static, or Pure Truth, is an alter-is, so it is a problem! And he misunderstood that! Soy he is not a problem himself, but the conditions he is in. They are a problem.
And him, as Static, could not solve the problems of his conditions, as long as him, Static himself, was a problem!
Soy he tried to solve a problem with a problem and it didn't work!!
But now, he can see that he as Static, is not a problem. so he can solve the problems!!! Huge win! F/TA.
Rest of processes and B/CB Steps to EPs.